Thursday, June 7, 2012

Recipe: Saturday Night on the New Deck

This Saturday, I plan to wow the World's Most Awesome In-Laws with an authentic steakhouse meal that I've prepared many times to the shock and amazement of non-Vegans everywhere:

Steakhouse Chopped Salad
Steakhouse Baked Potatoes

Steakhouse Creamed Spinach

Grilled or Broiled Tenderloin Steaks
Vegan Ice Cream (store-bought)
Fresh Strawberries
Steakhouse Chopped Salad

The key to a steakhouse chopped salad is maximum crunch, lots of ingredients that drown any pretense of health, and everything chopped just this side of purée.

So that each person can select what they want and in what quantity, chop all of the ingredients separately, set them out as a build-your-own buffet, and put out two mixing bowls (one vegan, one non-vegan) for tossing the ingredients together with 2T-¼ cup of my homemade "ranch" dressing.

Salad Bar: (per person)

1 large boneless skinless chicken breast, baked and chopped in ½ -1" pieces

2 gardein Chick'n scallopini, prepared according to package, chopped in ½ -1" pieces

1-2 hearts of romaine, chopped in ½ -1" pieces

2 cucumbers, peeled, seeded and diced into ¼ - ½" pieces

½ small bunch of green onions, diced into ¼" pieces

½ Hass avocado, diced into ½" pieces

8-10 grape tomatoes, diced small

3-4 T Real Bacon Bits

3-4 T Bac-Os

You could also add:

1 hardboiled egg, diced

Crumbled blue cheese

"Ranch" Dressing:

1 cup lowfat plain kefir OR plain soy yogurt thinned with a little unsweetened soy milk

3T Tofutti Cream Supreme mixed with plain soy milk

2 T dried parsley

2 T dried dill

1 tsp cumin

1 tsp garlic powder

Steakhouse Baked Potatoes

Pour olive oil to cover the bottom of a pie plate and with large granule sea salt (freshly-crushed black pepper and garlic powder optional). Roll Yukon Gold potatoes (1-2 potatoes/person) to coat the skins in the oil and pierce them with the salt, then bake as you would a regular baked potato. Serve with real/vegan sour cream and butter, but they're honestly good enough to eat without!

Steakhouse Creamed Spinach

Spinach at a steakhouse is smothered in cream. To about 1 cup of plain soy creamer, add ¼ - ½ tsp grated nutmeg and ¼ - ½ finely chopped white onion... depending on how strong the onions are, I'll add just a dash of garlic powder. Heat the mixture, but do not boil. Mix with one prepared package of frozen spinach (the kind in the box). Put in an oven-safe baking dish and cover with vegan shredded mozzarella cheese. Place under the broiler until cheese is melted and slightly browned (can go in with the steaks).

Grilled or Broiled Tenderloin Steaks

If serving non-vegans, use the rest to coat the tenderloin steaks (6-8 oz./person) before throwing them on the grill. Hand them off to your designated carnivore for grilling and they'll come back with a steakhouse-worthy crispy crust that seals in juices. It's important to ensure this lean cut stays tender... and not just because vegans rarely have steak knives ;)

Cheesecake, Vegan Ice Cream, Strawberries and Coffee

The only possible authentic steakhouse dessert is cheesecake- I like to serve New York style with strawberries and coffee. *Please* let me know if you find a passable vegan version of cheesecake!!!

Since vegans can only have the strawberries and coffee, I always serve vegan ice cream. Vanilla sprinkled with cinnamon is perfect!

1 comment:

  1. My grandma taught me a different way with the baked potatoes. Wash the skins, then rub Crisco or lard on every inch - let no calorie go unwasted - and then sprinkle all sides with salt. Bake unwrapped so the bastards get crispy.

    Also, FYI, putting the word 'steakhouse' in front of each menu item does, indeed, make it an authentic steakhouse meal.